I think every bride questions her decisions throughout the entire wedding planning process, and I was no exception. Planning a destination wedding adds a few extra challenges–and planning a Disney wedding adds in some challenges of its own. So, after the wedding, I sat down and made a list of the things I was GLAD I DID and the things I WISH I DIDN’T DO. Here’s that list:
Glad I Did:
- Got married at Disney: I fell in love with Frank at Disney, and Disney became a big part of our relationship, and once I knew I wanted to marry him, I started to think about the wedding. Way back then I didn’t even know getting married at Disney was an option. But I stumbled across the wedding board on Disboards and the obsession began. It was several years before he actually proposed but I knew in my heart Disney was the right place for us. I wasn’t sure if he’d be up for it or not though. Luckily, he’s a very smart man, haha. I still get a thrill every time I tell someone we were married at Disney. [Note from 2018 Brooke: This is STILL true!!]
- Had a Disney Fairy Tale Wedding: I guess this seems like an obvious one, but I am SO happy that we had a Disney Fairy Tale Wedding. With the hours that we work, I didn’t have a ton of time to plan and make lots of detailed choices. I did some DIY, but the bulk of our planning happened before and during our planning session…it was great to be able to trust that Disney would get everything right. Our planner was Vita, and while we didn’t necessarily have the warm fuzzy relationship that some of the other brides have had with their planner, she was professional and helpful and very patient. She did a very good job making things happen the way I wanted and making sure we stuck to our timeline. A little too good at times, haha, but I’ll get into that later. We spent a bit more money getting married through DFTW than we would have if we’d gone with one of the other options we considered, but for us, this was the best option.
- Chose the Wedding Pavilion: This was one of the toughest decisions for me…I absolutely loved Sea Breeze Pointe and had really thought it would be the best place for us…I loved the water and the venue is so lovely….but I worried a lot about the weather…and knew I would be heart broken if we ended up in a ballroom. I also am Castle obsessed, and thought the Wedding Pavilion was also a gorgeous venue. I worried that it was too big for our small affair though. I’d never been in it, but I’d seen tons of pictures and knew it was beautiful. Ultimately: Frank actually pushed the decision. As we neared our 18 month “pencil us in” point, we discussed the venues a lot and basically he said that he knew if we chose Sea Breeze Pointe, I would spend the next 18 months worrying about the weather and he knew that I would make myself crazy and that was NOT OK with him. He felt the Wedding Pavilion was the no-brainer choice (because I’m a CRAZY worrier) because no matter what the weather, our guests would be comfortable and I could control the location, regardless of rain or cold, etc. We’d been to Disney in November several times, and had experienced freezing temperatures and snow and also experience extremely WARM temperatures and everything in between. So to minimize my crazy, we chose the WP and I am so glad we did. I loved the venue, it was so beautiful and I loved being able to see the castle as I walked down the aisle. We also ended up using elements from the stained glass at WP in our invitations which made it even more special for us.
- Chose Ariel’s for our reception: This was another tough one. I considered a lot of different places. Originally I really wanted Narcoosee’s, especially once I committed to the Wedding Pavilion. It’s proximity to the WP was a factor, and it’s so pretty. I also really loved the Living Seas Salon. My planner and my photographers kind of discouraged me from Narcoosee’s and suggested other GF venues like Citricos and the Whitehall room. I didn’t really connect with Citricos, and my favorite thing about the Whitehall room was the outside space, which again, concerned me with the weather. I didn’t really like the room itself…it felt too much like a ballroom and not special or “Disney” enough for me. I didn’t want to spend much on décor, and worried a lot that I would end up wanting to spend way more on décor if we did Whitehall. My planner then suggested Ariel’s and some of the ballrooms at the Boardwalk. We looked at pictures and pretty much narrowed it down to Ariel’s and LSS. Ultimately it was the transportation costs that made the decision for us…we had to pay for transportation either way, but the requirements for LSS made it much more costly and the minimums there were higher…the reception overall would have cost more. And I had concerns with the lighting; it looked pretty dark in a lot of the pictures I’d seen. I still have twinges over this one, because it really is such a cool and beautiful venue….but for our budget, Ariel’s was the right decision. It was beautiful, and worked great with our color scheme. It’s a bit unique and doesn’t have that “ballroom” feel. No outside space, which was a bummer, but it was so bright and had so much light coming in from outside I didn’t miss it.
- Hired David and Vicki Arndt for our Photography: VERY early on, even before I could contact Disney, I reached out to David and Vicki and reserved them for our (hopeful) date. Photography was one of the most important things to me, other than marrying Frank and getting married at Disney. I had looked at about a million planning journals and wedding recaps and the pictures that I loved over and over were Roots and David and Vicki. Roots were way too pricey for us, I knew if I went that direction, I wouldn’t be able to afford a video and a video was also EXTREMELY important to me. I ruled out Disney Fine Arts Photography when I’d discovered that you couldn’t guarantee your photographer, that really scared me. Plus, I knew that I was most likely hitting my minimums without photography and their packages were really pricey. David and Vicki were priced really good, and I loved their work. Once I talked to them, I liked them even more!!! So I booked them in July 2013, even before I could confirm our date and venue with DFTW. GREAT decision. I love our pictures and they helped a lot on the actual wedding day, making us both feel really good and beautiful and special, which I’m sure also impacted our pictures.
- Chose Cinemedia for our Videography: Videography was almost as important to me as photography. I’d waited a LONG time for this day and I knew it would be overwhelming and pass really quickly and that I wanted a way to relive it later on. Choosing a videographer was tough. There are a lot of great ones out there…Two that I really liked initially were just way more than I could afford to spend. Eventually it came down to two that were in my budget that I really liked: Trinity and Cinemedia. I liked them both a lot. Two things impacted my decision the most: Timing to get the video: David at Trinity told me 6-8 months and Cinemedia told me 3-4 months. The other thing was raw footage. I really wanted that. David at Trinity refused outright…wouldn’t even let me buy it (I believe he has since changed his stance on that) while Steve at Cinemedia automatically included it without me even having to ask for it. I chose Cinemedia and I think it was a great decision. I’m thrilled with the finished products and I love the raw footage. There are lots of little moments that no one else would care about that didn’t make the final videos but that are special to me and I’m happy to have them.
- Worked with Renee Silverman as our Officiant: Other than photography/videography, the other most important thing to us was the ceremony itself. We really wanted a ceremony that was personal and really reflected the two of us. Fortunately, Carrie did an episode of the Disney Wedding Podcast featuring Renee Silverman, and what she described about personalizing the ceremony resonated with both of us (I made Frank listen to the episode after because I liked Renee so much). We scheduled a Skype session with Renee and by the end, we both knew Renee was the right choice for us. She was a little more expensive than a couple of the other officiants I was considering, but ultimately, she was the perfect fit for us. She was really easy to work with and very supportive and helpful. She gave great advice and really went above and beyond for us. She also worked with Frank to incorporate a couple of surprises and I never had a CLUE!!!
- Did a Unity Glass Ceremony: I knew I wanted to include a Unity Ceremony of some kind. I didn’t want to do a Unity candle, I wanted to do something different. I was mostly decided on a sand ceremony but it didn’t feel quite right…then I read another planning journal where they had done a Unity Glass Ceremony, and I did some research on that and it was perfect for us. I loved the idea of the crystals being combined, like the sand, where you could never separate them again, but then melted down and merged together permanently and forged into an art piece that we would then have in our home forever. This was another decision that pulled budget dollars away from other things, but it was totally worth it! We love our finished sculpture and the Unity Glass team was great to work with. We received the finished sculpture super fast, too.
- Had a Caricature Artist at our Pre-Reception/Reception: This was another decision made pretty early on. We knew we probably wouldn’t have people dancing during our brunch, but we wanted something to entertain them. We’d gotten ours done once at the parks and thought it was so much fun, as soon as I’d read that was something you could have at a DFTW reception, it went on the “must have” list. Our particular guy was GREAT and was absolutely the hit of the day for most of our guests.
- Moved some of the food from the reception menu to the “pre-reception”: Carrie Hayward had recommended this in her book, and it was absolutely the right decision for us. We moved the fruit and yogurt and pastries to the pre-reception from the reception, and added a cheese tray in place of a different item on the original menu. The pre-reception food was a big hit, and didn’t impact the overall budget much at all.
- Went with the limo instead of the classic car: One of my original “must haves” was a classic car for our transportation to the reception. Frank loves old cars, and I really wanted to do that for him. But when the pricing came in it was ridiculous and we decided to scrap the classic car idea and stick with the more economical limo. Don’t regret it a bit—we were with the limo for such a short time…and for the few pictures we would have gotten with the car, we would have had to sacrifice other pictures at the wedding pavilion and as it was, we didn’t get enough time there…so it was a good decision.
- Had a Welcome Party the night before: We had a Wishes Dessert Party with some real food at the Port Cochere at the Contemporary. We both LOVE Wishes and I was kind of bummed that many of our guests wouldn’t get to see it due to the shortness of their trips, so including it in our Welcome Party was great. We piped in the Wishes music and that was a big expense but VERY worth it!
- Had a rehearsal and had it AT the Wedding Pavilion: I was really nervous and having the quick rehearsal the night before really calmed my nerves and was fun. Also gave us a chance to give out our wedding party gifts at the WP before the Welcome Party so we didn’t have to give them out in front of everyone else. Vita had originally said she couldn’t guarantee that we could rehearse at the WP, that it might be in a ballroom, but I was worried about the steps at the WP so I’m really glad it worked out for us to do it at the WP. Also, our officiant wasn’t available to attend the rehearsal which initially I was really worried about, but it turned out fine that she wasn’t there, and saved me the extra fee we would have had to pay if we’d had her attend.
- Had an Epcot Dessert Party the night of the Wedding: This was a FABULOUS ending to our wedding day for our guests. The weather was perfect that night, and our spot in the UK was great. The food was good (so I’m told, I didn’t have any!) and the fireworks were AMAZING as always. We got some great pictures and some great time with our guests and everyone loved it.
- Did a Soarin’ ride mix in for our guests: (and skipped it ourselves): I really wanted to include a ride experience for our guests on the wedding day. Buying out a ride was cost prohibitive but the “mix in” was an affordable option. After the dessert party, our guides took all our guests to Soarin’ and they all got to ride. I was told early on that I wouldn’t be able to ride in my dress, so my original plan was to go along and I was hoping they would let me stand in the same room and watch while our guests rode. Frank didn’t like that idea but he wanted the experience for our guests, so we planned it. Everyone loved it, and said they all felt like celebrities. We didn’t end up going with them though, because Vicki was able to talk one of our guides into letting us take pictures in the UK and Paris after the dessert party, which was an unbelievable opportunity. Some of my favorite pictures from the day are those pictures and it was a really nice wind down to the day for Frank and I.
- Brought flip flops to change into in case my wedding shoes hurt: My mom had bought me these fun sparkly flip flops a few months for the wedding and joked that they were my wedding shoes…well guess what? They kinda ended up being my wedding shoes. By the time we were done taking pictures after the ceremony, I’d been in my beautiful teal sparkly heels for about 3.5 hours and my feet hurt so bad I was getting nauseous. So off came the heels and on went the flip flops and that’s what I wore the rest of the day AND during our bridal portrait shoots at Animal Kingdom and Hollywood Studios. SO comfy!
- Did the Welcome Bags: I know a lot of people are down on the whole welcome bag idea, and say your guests won’t remember them or appreciate them–and that honestly may be the case with ours. BUT the Welcome Bags gave my mom and me a project to work on together during the LONG wait between booking the wedding and actually going to the wedding. There are MONTHS where there isn’t really anything wedding related to do, and my mom was traveling when I selected my dress, so I really wanted to have wedding project that we did together–and the Welcome Bags were perfect. We both obsessed about them (that’s our way), and for an anxious bride, it was really good to have something to think about and plan for when the rest of the stuff was out of my hands for awhile. Transporting the bags and delivering them was a HUGE project that my mom and my step dad took care of, thank goodness, and I know that was a TON of work, so perhaps it would have been smarter to skip them. But at the end of the day, we had a lot of fun making them, and I’m really glad we did them…In addition, my mom had done special bags for each of the kids that came to the wedding, and the kids, at least, I know opened their bags and loved their presents!
- Did Bridal Portrait Shoots at Animal Kingdom and Hollywood Studios: Note: from the very beginning, one of the major influences for me wanting a DFTW was I wanted those pictures in front of the Castle that you can only get in a MK Bridal Portrait Shoot….my mom really pushed for a Swan/Dolphin wedding but due to the rules at the time (since changed) the only way to do a MK shoot was to be a DFTW bride. So no other options. (The reality is that I probably would have chosen DFTW anyway due to venues, but the MK Park shoot was definitely a deal breaker). However, because I felt so strongly about having David and Vicki do our photography, I was unable to book a MK park shoot prior to 45 days before the wedding. I went ahead and set up a Hollywood Studios one for a couple of days after the wedding, but hoped for months that MK would be an option. Unfortunately, when the 45 day window opened, there were no MK slots available. I was so disappointed!!! DFAP ended up suggesting the Animal Kingdom shoot for more unique locations so we added that, and I told myself I could always come back later and hopefully get that MK shoot that I wanted so bad. I loved the AK and HS experiences though. We had a blast, and we got a lot of great pictures. [Note from 2018 Brooke: I still regret not getting those castle pictures in my wedding dress, but I don’t regret for a minute booking David and Vicki, so it’s a trade off I’m ok with. However, now that the rules have changed regarding Magic Kingdom shoots, I am hoping to be able to plan one for an anniversary trip in the future….]
- Had my hair and makeup professionally done: Honestly, I have never looked or felt I looked as pretty as I did on my wedding day. I am SO grateful that I managed to save up that money and make that happen for us on the wedding day, and for myself for the next two mornings for the bridal portrait shoots. I looked my absolute best and it really helped my joy and my stress.
- Purchased Memory Maker, and Coordinated it with all my Guests: This took a lot of communication and was honestly more work than it should be, but we purchased Memory Maker on our account, and then had all our guests link their accounts with ours, so we could have access to their PhotoPass pictures. I then made CDs for everyone with all the PhotoPass pictures from the whole trip. It was a great investment, and while not everyone understood PhotoPass, and we definitely have a few guests that I wish had used it more, I was thrilled to be able to have access to all those shots.
- Created a Photo Scavenger Hunt for our guests: I was so concerned about getting pictures of everyone from the trip, I kept worrying that we wouldn’t get enough time with everyone (we didn’t) and that we wouldn’t get to see and hear about their adventures (we didn’t) –so I came up with a Photo Scavenger Hunt for everyone to play to hopefully have some fun, and as a side benefit, I’d get a bunch of pictures sent to me as they all played the game. It wasn’t perfect–there are some wish I didn’ts for this, too, but overall, it was a big hit, and I’m glad we did it.
Things I wish we didn’t do or did differently: There really isn’t much here—everything turned out so beautifully and we enjoyed pretty much every minute. But there’s always something, right?
- I wish we’d had professional photography at the Welcome Party: This was originally in our BEO and I cut it, and boy do I wish I’d left it in. David and Vicki were doing a wedding Saturday night so they weren’t available so I’d told our planner to put DFAP for the welcome party. It was about $400, and at the time, I felt I had to either cut the Wishes music or the photographer. My sister in law has a good camera and I knew she would take pictures, and I figured I would take pictures and my mom would take pictures and really, the wedding day was what was important, right? I wouldn’t have traded the Wishes music, that was critical…BUT I wish I’d scrounged up the $400. Frank and I were too busy talking with everyone to take many pictures, and the lighting was not great, so many of my pictures are too dark or blurry because I didn’t hold still long enough for the conditions. My mom and step dad ended up taking NO pictures at any wedding events, because they too were doing the hosting thing and talking to everyone. My sister in law got some good pictures but nowhere near enough, and we got pretty much NO good fireworks pictures and no pictures of our seating, which I really wanted. In the grand scheme of things, it’s not a big deal, we got really great pictures the next day but the Welcome Party was our first big wedding event and I’m disappointed that we don’t have better pictures.
- I wish we’d had heaters at the Welcome Party: Saturday was a gorgeous Sunny day, with temps in the high 80’s low 90’s. Who would have thought that night would be 40’s and very windy??? Not us. I wish we’d considered the potential cold, really all I’d worried about was rain, and I knew we were covered at Port Cochere, I didn’t expect the cold. My mom is mad Vita didn’t suggest them, but I should have asked. We tried to rent them that evening but they basically said it was something you had to set up in advance. So it was a VERY chilly evening. Still fun, but COLD. Everyone is in sweatshirts and jeans and still look cold in the pictures, and the party wrapped up super quick after the fireworks–which if everyone had been more comfortable, I don’t think would have happened. Oh well.
- I wish I’d done a better job breaking in my wedding shoes: I loved those shoes, but boy did they hurt.
- I wish I’d planned the bride/groom gift exchange thing better. It ended up being a problem the morning of the wedding, and screwed up our timing and I think added some stress we didn’t need.
- I wished we’d finished a few more last minute details before the trip: I managed to get almost everything done before our trip, but there were a few things that we were scrambling to finish that again, added unnecessary stress and aggravation to our trip. I’ll talk more about specifics in the recap.
- I wish I’d followed through on the weight loss and lost another 20 lbs. This is totally on me. I had plenty of time to lose the weight slow and healthy. I knew what I needed to do, I had plenty of time, I just didn’t do it. In the end, the dress fit and I looked good BUT I could have looked better and the lacing of the dress was an extremely tense part of the morning and my mom made a really big deal about it, and really, 10 more pounds and it would have been a non issue. There are pictures where my fat really bothers me, although my photographers did a great job making me look as good as possible, I’m disappointed with myself that I didn’t make it happen.
- Transportation: My mom did a lot of research on transportation, and ended up strongly pushing me to let her book transportation for our guests for a few of the one-ways to save money. And it did save about $500, which is a LOT. BUT it added a lot of scheduling and coordination work to my mom’s plate (and stress) and ended up letting us down a couple of times. For example: my mom booked the cab to pick up my bridesmaids the morning of the wedding and bring them to my room. The car got lost and they were waiting almost a half hour. Cindy texted me, my mom called them, they called the driver…it all worked out but AGGRAVATION. After the welcome party and after the reception were two other places we had booked our own transportation and both times, our guests ended up waiting too long and having to call. And it put way too much stress and worry on my mom when I wanted her to just have a great time. It just wasn’t worth it.
- I wish I’d done a better job coordinating with my bridesmaid on the reception music: We didn’t have DJ, so I’d made playlists for the reception on my iPod and planned to have my bridesmaid Cindy or her husband take care of it. But we never ended up discussing it, and she ended up getting aggravated with Vita about it and it added some stress to her day that I didn’t want. I’ll explain more about this in the recap.
- I wish we had more time: This is one of those things that I really regret but the reality is, owning our own business, there was never going to be a way for it to be different. I read about brides who had a week before the wedding and a real honeymoon after the wedding and I get so jealous. Our time felt so rushed and more than anything, I wish that we’d had more time. More time with our guests, more time before the wedding to enjoy everyone, more time together alone after the wedding, etc. This trip we actually were gone for 7 days, which is the longest trip we’ve ever taken and the business suffered as a result, so even 7 days was too long…I’m glad we took the 7 days but wish it had been feasible to do a longer trip and to be more relaxed.
- I wish I’d done a better job taking pictures at the Group Meals we did in in the parks: We planned several group meals in the parks where a lot of our guests joined us, and I do have a few pictures from each of those events, but I was so busy having fun with everyone, I didn’t get enough pictures of everyone. So basically, I wish I had a clone that could have taken lots of great pictures while I had fun and talked to everybody :-).
- I wish I’d simplified the Photo Scavenger Hunt and Explained it Better to Everyone: Overall the hunt was a big success, and those that played really enjoyed it. However, about 1/3 of our guests never even realized they had the game in their welcome bag and didn’t play at all. And because, I made the game unnecessarily complicated, I ended up spending a LOT of time on my wedding day on the laptop in a spreadsheet tabulating scores…which wasn’t my brightest move ever. I gave everyone a lot of choices of different things to do, thinking everyone would pick and choose a few things, and assigned points to different things, based on how difficult they were to complete. Instead of the players each picking a few items each, most players tried to complete A TON of items…Which was super fun and resulted in some great pictures…but meant a lot of scoring. This added some extra work and stress that I probably should have reconsidered. [Note from 2018 Brooke: I’ve learned since then, and my subsequent hunts have been way less complicated, this first one was a GREAT learning experience though.]
